When God is trying to tell us something, it seems to come up in everything we do! I love it because it reminds me that it is God and it helps keep me accountable to what He is teaching me. Prime example, the past week.
To preface this story I must share a little "gross" detail of living a life with Crohn's disease. When you are in a flare up, your mouth becomes consumed with ulcers. It sounds like a small thing, but when they cover the back of your throat, tongue and gums, it can be a very painful time. Two weeks ago I noticed my ulcers coming back. They have gotten pretty bad this week to the point that it really hurts to talk and to eat. So, I have been a "little" more quiet this week. I even had a couple of friends ask today why I was being quiet. I quickly reassured them that I was not upset or anything, just having some mouth pain. Enter small group last night.
In our small group we are going through 2 Timothy; last night was about chapter 2. "Godless chatter" was a huge theme that we discussed. "Avoid godless chatter, because those who indulge in it will become more and more ungodly." 2 Timothy 2:16. I believe that godless chatter can be taken in a couple different ways: gossip, unwholesome talk, volgure language, and anything else that is not upliffting to the One who made us. After small group, I thought and prayed about what God was trying to tell me through this passage because it just kept coming up in my heart and mind. My first instinct was to think that God was telling me to watch my gossiping. And while this is something that I will always be cautious of, I felt like it was something different this time. Enter Wednesday night church tonight.
Our college minister talked about the same passage tonight, but he took it in a way that I had not thought of yet. Are my conversations that I have through out the day intentionally about Christ? Boom. It hit me right in the face. How many nights do I look back on my day and wish I had more spiritual conversations and not surface level ones? Too many times than I care to admit.
So there I was, sitting in the pew in the sanctuary, my mouth hurting, and my heart beating so fast because I knew this was God talking to me. I am so guilty of having pointless and meaningless conversations during my day just because I like to talk so much. But what if I was more cautious about my words and what came out of my mouth and instead of it being surface level things too often, if it became intentionally spiritual things. I truly believe that God used my hurting mouth to teach me this very valuable lesson this week. It is ok to be quiet. It is ok to not fill every second with a word coming out of my mouth. But instead be in prayer in those quiet times and use the times that I do talk to be intentional about what I say to glorify the Lord. The quiet that I have been provided the past few days has allowed me to clearly hear God's voice and not having my loud mouth interupting what He is teaching me.
Keep me accountable? Have more spiritual conversations with me? This is my prayer that God would help me be ok with the quiet and use my words more wisely. How many more lives can be welcomed into the family of God if I make my converstaions more intentional? I can't wait to find out!